Work · Writing

A Small Victory

I don’t know if I talked about this on here, but I’ve joined a writer’s group a while ago. We meet monthly at someone’s house, and read/critique each others’ works for a few hours on a nice relaxing Saturday. (Yep, totally relaxing, not nervous at all, especially if I’m the one that needs to be submitting next month, nope.) It’s not a class, so you don’t have to submit anything if you don’t want to. There’s no grading or expectations and most of us are amateurs. (It’s run by my author friend so she’s kind of the unofficial authority, but not really. She makes it a point to say it’s not her writers’ group, just a group she’s part of.) We basically let strangers read our works and collectively try to make them better, and chat and have food and just be social for a bunch of introverts. That’s it.

So we’re meeting next week (for the month of October) and I volunteered to submit a chapter of my novel. I partially did this because, well, I should, and also, I’ve been so, so, so procrastinating and haven’t worked on my novel at all for the past months due to one thing or another, and I need to get this damn draft done by hopefully end of this year. I need to revise the entire chapter before I can send it in, because the state it was was definitely not complete nor made any sense in context to the novel now, since it was written way before I figured out what the book was about and etc. It was daunting and scary, so I kept putting off working on it until literally this week, when the deadline to submit was yesterday. Yes, I’m a bad person for giving myself undue stress and for procrastinating. I fully acknowledge my fault here.

But you know what, in the end I did it. I worked a lot in the few days prior, basically ate, slept, worked, you know, like how most people’s days go and why American work ethics are insane (most not by choice.) And it was done, edited, not perfect, but submitted in an adequate state. And really, that’s all you can ask for, no? I emailed it to my group at 11:00 pm last night, an hour before the deadline (we have to enforce a deadline because people were like dropping 30 pages of work a few days before our meeting and that just wasn’t productive). And in addition the few days of hard work had kicked me into gear. Remember I said the more productive I am the more productive I get? Yeah, and now I actually feel like I have to write every day. Not necessarily on the novel – I need breaks, too – but some kind of writing daily. So all in all, this experience was a win. A hard win, but a win. Which was kind of why I signed up to submit this time in the first place. I know how to make myself do things, if slowly.

I don’t get many victories where I work hard and actually get things done on time in what feels like an acceptable condition. So I will definitely go celebrate today, as small a victory as this is. Perhaps I’ll buy a new book.